Pastor Funmi Akingbade is a popular s*x therapist, she says the average Nigerian man is usually in a rush when it has to do with issues with their women on the bed. In a chat with City People, she says to have a bliss marital life, great s*x must be incorporated and made to be fun. Read what she said:
How would you describe the Nigerian man when it comes to s*x?
The Nigerian man is always in a rush when it comes to sex. They rush into it and quickly rush out once they "come". Every driver that wants an accident-free trip must drive safely, know his road signs, have good driving skills and be a good observer. This is also true with s*x because marital s*x is a journey and not to be done in a rush. Those who want to succeed in marriage give their s*x life a lot of attention and s*x is what makes it different and wonderful. So, for no reason must a spouse "beg" or "plead" for s*x from her partner. Rather, good s*x should be given mutually at all times.
Why then do you think that the Nigerian man rush into and out of s*x?
Even though a pe-nis is controlled by the nervous system, it still has a mind of its own. Every woman loves foreplay but the African man has not much time for those sweet touching of a woman's body or genital before s*x, they see it as a waste of time...
If men tend to rush through foreplay, if at all they want to do it, they do it mildly and hurriedly. This is because they are ever ready the moment they have an erection. Delaying inter-course when they have an ere-ction and a willing woman nearby? That sounds idiotic to them because they see it as a waste of their precious time. A true Nigerian woman is not frigid. It is the way and manner a Nigerian man, lets say a black man, gives s*x to her that makes a black woman frigid.
A Nigerian man goes out from his own point of need and not from the woman's point of need. They rush into the woman's private part and rush out. They see the woman as an object to release into. They don't care whether she has an org-asm. All they are after is about themselves. They fail to realize that she has her s*xual Lib-ido which should be touched or aroused before dipping their man-hood into her. But we let them know that they should never rush the woman. A man should ask a woman to give him different styles and positions during s*x. She should be free to ask for s*x whenever she feels the urge.
Our men should allow the women to have s*x the way they enjoy doing it too. It shouldn't be just the Adam and Eve style where the man commands her to open and raise her legs and all of a sudden he rushes inside immediately. This means she has just been legally r*ped. Ask a woman what she wants in bed or during s*x, she will tell you she wants to be romanced, touched, kissed, she wants to be friendly. She wants to be bounced with her partner first and this will really make her come easily and sweetly.
She will never be frigid if the man presses the right buttons in her because s*x to a woman is emotion and she can trade s*x for affections because he wants s*x. The moment she gets affection from her man, she will be able to open up well for her man to come inside her. So a woman you can easily go into her heart is a woman you can easily get into her legs.
Before s*x, a woman will want the man to start with talk even if the talk is not relevant but she just needs your attention. She will want to be touched all over but not immediately at the main point of her body so that it does not appear like you are only interested in getting in-between her legs. Give her the attention, get bonded, get connected first because she wants to feel you.
So s*x to a man is a show of love he derives during s*x or after the s*x while that of a woman is a show of emotion she gets before s*x. So if you don't understand what a woman really needs in s*x, she will tighten her legs and lie down like a log or dead body lying in state because she is not feeling the man emotionally."